It’s so easy to say yes when you’re asked to do something easy, right? Taking notes for the group if you were already going to take notes for yourself? Cleaning up the table when you were already going to clean up after yourself?  Setting up for the meeting because you like the room to look good? Women tend to agree to perform non-promotable tasks at work more readily than their male-identified counterparts. We wonder–why?

Non-promotable tasks are often the social glue of the workplace. They are tasks that are essential for smooth functioning and operations, but aren’t not directly linked to strategic goals or organizational values. These non-promotable tasks help to build social connection and healthy workplace culture at the same time, but can be invisible to many. In many workplaces, women are expected to be the culture-creators, the workplace network weavers, and the people who get stuff done. They are expected to say yes. 

Women say yes because they think that if they say no, they won’t be offered the opportunity for the promotable tasks either. 

Women say yes because they worry about the consequences of saying no–the negative repercussions of declining non-promotable tasks that might impact their reputations. Many women may feel that saying no might then lead to negative repercussions. Perhaps it won’t lead to being fired, but it may lead to being passed over for promotable tasks like committee chair, conference coordinator, or keynote speaker. But so will saying “yes.”

We are often mystified by whether or not non-promotable tasks help or hurt us at work, and we say yes because no one else speaks up. How can we get out of that trap?

Here are a few questions and concerns to consider when faced with non-promotable tasks at work. 

• Is this an opportunity?
• Who does a “yes” reward?
• Who does a “no” hurt?
• Who does this benefit (examine the task)?
• Is the task urgent? 
• What is in it for me? 
• Today you might not be busy, but there’s always tomorrow. Look at your calendar: what does the next day, week or month look like, and how does this fit in?
• How might I say no responsibly, effectively and kindly? And in ways that will clearly convey NO?  
• “No” now vs. “No” forever: Is there a way to responsibly say no for now, but invite a future conversation?

When faced with these non-promotable tasks, many of us need helpful language to guide us. What’s language that works for you?  Here are some recommendations that we have gathered from folks in our orbit–from Gender Equity Advocates to other members of our network. 

• Delight. “I’m so delighted that you asked…” but no. This can be accompanied by other similar generous responses like “thank you so much for asking me….” or “This is so thoughtful” or “I’m so appreciative that you thought of me.” All just before you say NO. And if this is your authentic response, great, but it is often not. Do not force delight if we are not truly delighted that we were asked. Sometimes the only reason we are asked is because we are women.”
• Recommend someone else as an alternative: Consider a few people who either might be willing to take on the task or who might actually benefit from it, or even those who have not volunteered to contribute recently. Don’t call out their lack of engagement or participation, or their benefit from it, but having an idea of someone else who you can suggest will be an effort to solve a problem, not just to offer a NO.  
• Compromise: Every request can be met with a solution that offers a compromise. If it is about your time being used effectively or well, consider saying “Is this something urgent, or is this something that can be done next week/month/year?” This might help you to find a way to say no–or–yes on your timeline. Suggesting alternatives is one way of saying no, just a bit more ambiguously. 
• Offer solutions: Is there a different way that this can be done? Consider offering a set of solutions that enables the asker to see that you are not the right person to do this task. “This is so important. I am not the best person to ask, as I’m preparing for (the presentation, the conference, the meeting); you may want to ask…” or even “I wonder if there is a way we might be able to automate this task in our system.” Consider offering a suggestion for automation.
• Explain why: You can say something like, “My work is to do X/I was hired to do X/my current portfolio is to do X/my role is X. Doing Y would take away time from completing X well, and I know that we both want that”. You may also want to say exactly why: you may be preparing for an upcoming presentation, preparing a program launch, or teaching a class, or a million other important reasons that you do not have time. Share clearly the exact reason why you do not have time for this task, aligned with your assigned portfolio. Clear and comprehensive explanations help the person who is asking understand why asking you is not helpful: they often do not know what your job description is, and other obligations you may have as a part of your portfolio, and do not have a clear sense that the task that is being shared is actually a non-promotable task. 
• Utilize underutilized resources. If there is a person in your workplace who is supposed to manage these tasks but is not, for any reason, consider naming this. “If I am correct, this fits into X’s portfolio. I’d like to ask that you ask them first.” 
• Buy time: You can say, “Thanks so much for thinking of me for this. I need some time to think about it and how it fits in with my other priorities/obligations at work.” This works well with certain kinds of workplace busywork, but not all: use with caution.
• Set up a rotating schedule:  This helpful recommendation sets in motion structures that may be useful long term and can ensure that recurring tasks don’t become permanently assigned to you. “Let’s set up a schedule for this. If this is something that we do once a month, let’s create a signup sheet so that everyone can take a turn. I’ll gladly sign up for (a long time from now!).” Remember that maintaining the schedule is also a kind of busywork, but it is part of what’s required to get the work done. 

There are different scenarios and no one-size-fits-all response. Celebrating birthdays, if that is of value to the culture of your organization, is important; this doesn’t mean that the planning and execution of celebrations are your responsibility. Help determine some of the “quicksand asks” that will take you (and others) away from their work. Instead, suggest workarounds like some of those offered above. Each of these may prove more or less satisfying but will nevertheless offer a mechanism for deferring work that is not in your actual purview.to which you may have struggled to say no. If you have other recommendations for how you have effectively said no to office busy-work and other non-promotable tasks, please consider sharing them with us at info@genderequityinhringproject.org.

A number of years ago, in a fit of frustration, Linda Babcock, Brenda Peyser, Lise Vesterlund and Laurie Weingart founded The No Club, a space in which they discussed the busy work that was preventing them from getting promoted or advancing on their own academic career trajectories. It resulted in a fantastic book that they titled The No Club: Putting a Stop to Women’s Dead-End Work, which introduced the language of non-promotable tasks. If you’d like to learn more about how this team structured their plan and their internal learning and research about non-promotable tasks, we highly recommend grabbing the book and reading it (with a group of friends and/or colleagues, too).